Being Random

why can't i just fly back to visit
Japan seems so far now
it's no more the mere 7 hour flight to Komatsu airport
but also a consideration of accommodation, route, food, beverages and cash

of course there's other solution like calling back
with my phone phobia i guess it's only a matter of time i lose total courage to even press the number
and even if i call i can't speck Japanese

i thought about taking up Japanese lessons
picking up a new language to aid me in conversation
i'm eager to learn but i know it not a 1 month thingy and you'll master everything

it seems that i shouldn't be focusing too much about Japan
when i now at the last semester of poly
projects, tutorials and club matters piles
and i can't deny my mood is greatly affected by my results
it plunges DOWN

there's a whole checklist to do before Christmas
my flea market
till now i still haven't start with my preparations
and my long thought Christmas gift for host family is still undone

many of the things i do seem to involve alot of cash
but i've stop part time fearing that it is a factor that will cost my results to drop further
yet i still spend like nobodies business

at last i resorted to having fun like window shopping
even thinking of singing at kbox to distress
but how long can i hide from those work undone

i happen to overheard mish the other day
he was saying that there's only another 6.5 weeks left for us in poly
and i start wondering is it enough for us to finish our IAP or even revise everything?

at this point Japan is really getting real out of point
am i going to forget Japan and missing my host like hell
which i really did for the past 2 months
will it come to a point when we all realise that we GOT to move on with life?
and that i'll be replaced since they are hosting again for next year Mile Programme
soon their attention will be diverted to their new guest from Singapore
comes to think of it, if one of the girl didn't back up, i wouldn't be flying to japan anyways
can i still believe there's more than fate between us?

further studies, work, trap in a viscous cycle and earn some eyebags in the future?
is accounting really my cup to tea? will my cafe dream come true?
i really wonder.